Here are some helpful suggestions.
Homemade edibles are always nice, and this candle salad probably tastes even better than it looks.
....or cupcakes....with a personal, whimsical touch....
This is a rare breed, rumored to have been from Michael Jackson's private zoo.
...but I like them without wine....
How about a pizza slice sleeping bag?
I've woken up with a few of these beside me
Heck, I've woken up with a few of these, too...
I have a few good captions for this one
.....on second thought, I'd better not.....
and coffee mug
A crapping reindeer
(with flavored candy crap)
No thanks, I already have one
How about a charming holiday sweater?
Nope, not my size.....
This is for the dolt who gave you the sweater
Make a lamp from a real squirrel
gives new dimensions to the word "fun"
for the kiddies on your list:
a Hitler doll
(these two munchkins look psychotic enough without the doll.....)
Think of the possibilities....
a Shave the Baby doll
(not made in the U.S.A., thank God)
for future motel maids
Charles and Camilla
walking wind-up dolls
yea, my cats just can't wait
last but not least
gifts that can really be used
(Aw, lighten up....it's Christmas)